2011/04/06

Star Trek Spanking across the Universe...

I am a huge Star Trek fan. I was about 11 years old when television was finally introduced into South Africa, and when we eventually moved away from staring at the test pattern, to watch some actual programmes, Star Trek was amongst the first Science Fiction offerings. I immediately fell in love with Captain Kirk, Mr Spock and Scotty, although I did not have much of a liking for Dr McCoy.

However, can you imagine Mr Spock as a TOP?


Desperately trying to find ways not to explain to the alien with the pointy ears that I suffered a little mishap:
What does it mean, 'exact change'?
I have never understood the female capacity to avoid a direct answer to any question.
You will answer me.
You were saying you would have no trouble explaining it.
You have 8 minutes, 41 seconds.


Not doing a very good job of it:
Would you mind explaining that statement, please?
It appears that you have been keeping important information from me...


Some nervous tension building as all my explanations are ever so kindly blown out of the water:
Fascinating is a word I use for the unexpected. In this case, I should think "interesting" would suffice.
Are you sure, it is not time for a "colourful metaphor"?
I find this scientifically fascinating. Congratulations on a dazzling display of logic.


Okay, trying the "It was not that serious, it was more like a joke" routine...
A joke is a story with a humorous climax. I fail to see the humour in the situation.
Logic and practical information do not seem to apply here.
Insufficient facts always invite danger.
I do not believe you realize the gravity of your situation.


Attack is the best form of defence, so I will now revert to the use of anger and hurt, with some well-placed denials inserted here and there:
I fail to comprehend your indignation. I have simply made the logical deduction that you are a liar.
Once you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.
You are employing a double negative.
To deny the facts would be illogical.


That did not work to well; maybe I should use the love card?
You mean, love as motivation? Hmm. Humans do claim a great deal for that particular emotion.
Not only did you violate the rules, you also fail to understand the principal lesson.
What you want is irrelevant, what you have chosen is at hand.


Conclusion:
It seems that it would be unavoidable that my bottom would rather be red and tender. Note to self: Avoid aliens with pointy ears, and with words such as illogical in their vocabulary, unless you have ample soft cushions lying around.
I do not threaten. I merely state facts.
True. Constant exposure does result in a certain degree of - contamination.
I am sure you will find it a fascinating experience.


(Source)
Mr Spock quotes in Star Trek episodes/movies, definitely out of context, but logically re-arranged.

16 comments:

dd said...

Raven, I loved the early Star Trek series (though some of them scared me so much it was banned for a while) and my fantasies, in my youth, mainly had Spock and Kirk as strict older brothers :)

Hugs,

dd x

joeyred51 said...

Very, very clever. Star Trek was my favorite SyFy series in US.

ronnie said...

Excellent post Raven, thanks.

Spock was my favourite.

Love,
Ronnie
xx

Velvet said...

I swear I was married to Spock's cousin for too many years than I care to recall. Unfortunately he was definitely not a Top, despite many attempts from me to interest him in that way. When it finally became clear that we should go our separate ways he actually referred to an emotional response to our breakup as being 'illogical' and devised a spreadsheet of suggested solutions...

hugs,
Velvet <3

joeyred51 said...

I must confess that I am a geek. I was an extra in a Star Trek episode that did not air. But, it was really surreal wearing the uniform.

wordsmith said...

Fantastic! ;-)

Raven Red said...

dd
Can promise you that I NEVER thought about Captain Kirk as my stricter older brother....GRIN

Hugs

Raven

Raven Red said...

Thanks Joey...I think Star Trek was one of the reasons why I still love Sc-Fi.

Hugs

Raven

Raven Red said...

Ronnie

I think that all those characters are unique...but yes, Mr Spock was one of a kind

Hugs

Raven

Raven Red said...

Velvet

I do sympathise - but have to admit that your last bit of comment had me rolling with laughter. I hope you told him where to stick his spreadsheet...all in an illogical way!

Raven Red said...

Joey

OMG...they allowed you to keep the uniform!

Raven

Raven Red said...

Wordsmith

Why, thank you Sir

Hugs

Raven

Michelle Carlyle said...

I am a HUGE star trek fan and have had fantasies about Kirk spanking me since I was a kid. I liked the first series and Next Generation, but not the rest so much. Loved the movies, too. We own all those on DVD and we even have a Star Trek Next Generation Pinball machine. And all the toys, the ships, the communicators, WAY TOO MUCH star trek geeky stuff. LOVE, LOVE, LOVE your post!!!!!!!!!

BareSpanker said...

How about when Kirk offers to teach "Elaan Of Troyius" about the old earth custom of administering a sound spanking. I was so disappointed when it didn't happen. Also those short spaceoutfir mini skits used to drive me mad too. TYhey only gve us such short tantalizing glimpses of female bottom. One always wanted to see more....

Raven Red said...

Michelle

Happy that you enjoyed! (Be spanked, and prosper?) GRIN

Hugs

Raven

Raven Red said...

Barespanker

I love the way his voice change when he does explain to her what this old earth custom is all about...and it is a pity that he never did, I agree.

Hugs

Raven

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