2011/04/17

Honesty

In my early twenties, I met a man with whom I fell passionately in love with, he was everything I wanted and more, and I could not quite believe my luck that he seemed to be just as in love with me. However, it was only a fairy tale that ended in such tragedy, not only for me - but also for another girl that was pulled into the web of deceit. He was a fraudster in all the ways you can think of, and for her, her willingness and eagerness to do things out of love, in the end resulted in her taking her own life. He was convicted and sentenced to go to prison, all the glamour and status that everyone had attached to him, stripped away in a blink of an eye. Me?

 

In the days that were to come, I heard from many voices that were dealing with the chaos he left in his wake, that even he admitted, that even after two years of trying, he was unable to move me in the direction of assisting him in his activities. I was chosen not for me, but for the position, I had held in a company. Moreover, like the fool I was, I was totally oblivious to all this. In the aftermath, a lot of attention was paid to the dealings of people within the company, and during this period, two people were going out of their way to spread the nastiest of rumours about me.


I do not remember much of the days that did follow, I was broken on so many levels that I could barely function. One day, I was called into a manager's office, where I was informed that the investigations were over. The two people that were so active in smearing my name were found to be involved in their own little money making scams, however, no wrongdoing could be found in anything that I did - and taken the circumstances they would like to award me for my honesty. That was the day when I finally broke down.


I did nothing out of the ordinary where my work was concerned, I did what was expected of me, and I did it well. I was oblivious to the attempts that he did make to alter my work ethics, and yes, in hindsight I could remember the incidents - how I laughed at him about certain statements, how I refused to discuss procedures that were deemed as confidential. However, nothing could take away the knowledge that I was nothing more than a fool, a fool that was left with her heart broken in small bitter pieces.


The reason for telling this non-spanking story on a Sunday morning? I have been receiving mails from a girl that used to be on the Facebook pages. She is in trouble, and she needs professional help, but part of the damage that has been done to her, was through the lies and deceit that people now so easily spread through the internet. I have become the focus of her delusions, but at the same time, my heart is breaking for her.


The dangers of the internet are known – there are those who deliberately set out to deceive, defraud and commit crimes. Nevertheless, the internet also offers anonymity, a place where you can talk freely about your dreams, your fantasies, and your life. Here I am known as Raven Red, which obviously is not my real name. However, this I do know - everything that I have written down or wrote about is based on the truth, and is the truth. Where it is not, and is a tale, I will say that it is.


It had taken years to recover from something that happened to me when I was barely twenty-four, and therefore I know how important it is to be honest in everything I do. I know what it feels like to be on the receiving end of deliberate deceit and lies - and no one should be left, (normally alone) bewildered and hurt beyond comprehension to pick up the pieces of their lives.

11 comments:

joeyred51 said...

Hug from the states.

Ms Scarlett said...

Dear Raven,

Yes many a good woman and the occasionaly goodman have been deceived to the extent that you have. Be assured that you have been 100% circumspect and as you , I feel for the girl. There are far to many charlatans that hide behind the big wide web.

Love & hugs

Scarlett
P.S enjoy tomorrow evening, focus on that and yourself. :)

dd said...

Raven, there are arts around everywhere, often disguised. I know you hurt for this poor girl, but unfortunately she has to live her own life.

Hugs, sweetie, xx

dd said...

mmm, sorry, bad typo, should have read RATS!

Malcolm said...

You say you were a fool; but it doesn't look quite like that to me. Naïve perhaps, but possessed of a degree of integrity that belies the term "fool."

Sorry to hear about the unfortunate girl. I have helped one such 16-yr-old hopeful that I met on Person.com by prompting her to distrust a man whom she met on that site and who seemed not to be genuine. She soon got the idea of how to investigate. Every girl should be shown easy ways to find out about men they meet online before they get too involved.

Pink said...

It is all too easy to lie and create a world of fantasy online. I have seen it many times and experienced it personally more than once.

I have to agree, though, with Malcolm -- you were not a fool. Fooled, yes. But not a fool. We should not be faulted for believing in people.

Don't ever stop believing in people! (Just check the facts.)

Hugs,

Pink


(Sorry I have been gone from your blog for some time. Life happened. And I'm not making that up. :P )

Raven Red said...

Joey

Thank you for the hug - at least is has been a couple of years ago. Wounds did heal - now again, the scar just reminds me how deep it was though...

Hugs

Raven

Raven Red said...

Scarlett

Enjoy?? Eish...

Hugs

Raven

Raven Red said...

dd

Gathered re the rats...(GRIN). You are SO polite! (HUG)
I know what you are saying, but for months now this girl has not been living her life - I truly hope that she does find her way back to herself again.

Hugs

Raven

Raven Red said...

Malcolm

Thank you for the kind words, and yes, I was so naive in my early twenties. Trusted the whole damn world and their friends...

Hugs

Raven

Raven Red said...

Miss Pink

I still believe very strongly in always giving people the benefit of the doubt, but then on the other hand I am much older and wiser. Can see through most of it...and I sort of do it for a living as well.

And I agree - never give up on people. Maybe for the fact that I am living in a country that has gone through so much turmoil, it is easier for me than most to accept that people come in all shapes and sizes, all with their quirks, bad and good habits.

To be honest as well, I live by simple mottos - each to his own, and live and let live.

Hugs

Raven

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